1. Old Soul Syndrome
2. Wishing You Well
2. Wishing You Well
4. American Experiment
5. Second Generation Bum
6. My Captain's Bed
7. Damaged Goods
8. Taste of Hunger
9. Neurosis Put to Sound
10. Born Fully Grown
11. Monkey
12. When the Raven Sings
13. Ash
Old Soul Syndrome
out of nowhere it seems like i’ve been here
bound by the years thrown around by these fears
if children only speak what they hear
hand over their eyes hand over their ears
hand over fist my hands were tied
now if you take me take me by surprise
take my soul
I never said its mine
I won’t need it back until the day I die
is there something I should’ve known about
but never bothered to find out
now you doubt me for my doubts
once you stooped low enough to help me out
as what I thought was a cycle was really just a spiral
I went above and beyond my own sinking level
I suffered gladly through my greatest hours of need
I put myself last to see how far it’d get me
down every road of recovery down every lane of memory
the only one who looked both ways before crossing me
had a PhD in divinity and a knowledge of past life therapy
saying don’t worry about me I only steal things that are free
I only steal things that are free
take my soul
I never said its mine
I won’t need it back until the day I die
battling symptoms of old soul syndrome battling symptoms of old soul syndrome like the farmer who tills the earth but later lies beneath with his lady in waiting now bathing his feet they seek salvation in a pale Galilean as interstates and bridges crumble around them hung up on their cross health care denied found tarred and feathered they still called it suicide take my soul I never said its mine I won’t need it back until the day I die in the future of memory we’ll see into the past close to some garden where they say history began I’ll write the last words ever written if you find the first words ever penned take my soul I never said it’s mine I won’t need it back until the day I’m alive
Wishing You Wellenter bone chilling cold too few years to feel this old hours fade fast into years no clock is running slow here exit temperature running low with it a heart beats faint and slow no one here is able to tell how it is you did this to yourself help wishing you well get up if you need a different view what have you been reduced to cardiac arrest at 13 tube up your nose alive because of a machine you’re a machine counting tiles on the floor washing until you can’t wash anymore you’re young of all the places to go you’re on the top floor of another psyche ward nursing home away from home with seizures and shaking fainting spells you’re not living proof you’re living hell help me help myself they locked you away as the hospital radio played
Mother Earth’s Abortion
when are you going to walk on water
when are you going to walk on air
when are you going to see you only need the same as anyone here
or has self-sacrifice and the postmodern man
taught you how to live in unlivable situations
with a view straight from the birds eye
under an empty sky
I've been trying to enter your atmosphere through the eyes of mine
where I’ve been living in darkness both day and night
now all I can hope for is the sun in my eyes
as I wait for and pray for this fear of death to diewith a view straight from the birds eye
under an empty sky
it wouldn’t be the first time
it shouldn’t happen now and again
get her where you want her by leaving her where she stands time is using us up
do you get the notion my friend
we’ve been bearing witness to mother earth’s abortion
she brings you water but no solution for your needs
when the pollution in your veins becomes the words you breath still you’ve got your strip mine I’ve got my diamond pipe in the land of living but in the land of the dead tonight there is a view straight from the bird's eye
everyone enters a race to find their place
down here on an earth so lost in space
everyone here seems to be going somewhere
nobody knows what to do
when and if they get there
when and if they get theirs
American Experiment
you talked about peace having a fighting chance
while my brother’s blood line was drawn in the sand
you said all could be forgotten as easily as we forget
but not when you travel the world with your hands folded
in a fist
a young man on the front line
for the old man’s bottom line
same old story in a different time
he says I haven’t thought for myself for so long
now they have to do it for me but they do it all wrong
as the time we’re living on might as well be borrowed
if leaders only go where the people follow
we think things are better now but it’s not legit
they just got us a little to used to it
say who can say if that is what the forefathers meant
when they called this grand land an American experiment
they pass off paranoia for awareness at a cost
when you don’t know why you fight have you already lost
dividing a wide world into safe zones
where fools on both sides stand as fools alone
say who can say if that is what the forefathers meant
when they called this grand land an American experiment
you’re so young you’re so free
can you stay that way the way you’re going
what are you looking forward to
are you looking at all
where you once suffered from crime
now you suffer from your laws
as kids try to find what this land is built on
they don’t say god-like guns and church bells melted into cannons
not a drop causing the flood feels guilty
all the tables turned here will simply sit empty
as you try to fill a space everybody else sees
don’t become a part of the manufactured dream
sold to the highest bidder Second Generation Bum before you ask what I’m doing here tonight whatever you’re thinking you’re probably right before you ask who it is I’m trying to impress your best guess is if they exist they left sometimes it isn’t much every time it’s all I’ve got I guess you’ll see me dead before you see me stop you asked my life story it was pretty long so you talked half way through it and told me what I’m doing wrong but you’re the one who woke up on your lawn locked out of your own house can you trust the words coming out of your own mouth as you wander off in a trance try to jump the outside fence but make friends with the cement because around your ankles are your pants so many rise to meet you I can’t sit up straight so many rise to greet you and I don’t know what to say sometimes it isn’t much
every time it’s all I’ve got
I guess you’ll see me dead before you see me stop
I’d rather be a second generation bum than sing as a slave on a modern plantation just give me one more shot man just give me one more chance melodies move like that pinball machine competing with the bar TV screen I’m not sure why I fear footsteps behind me carrying my equipment around back alleys
My Captain’s Bed
for so long I was blown around on my own
thrown to the open road that always felt so closed
always felt like I was never there
the world was a war of nerves
and I was too dead to care
but you caught me at the height of my fallen state
you told me not to drown but rather mount the waves
through the highs and lows that reshaped me
to ride the tide now on many an ancient sea
still I find no rest captive in my captain’s bed
when the options are endless
all I say can be betrayed by a kiss
leaving me red as the wine that stains my lips
when I think it’s enough it doesn’t add up to much
such is the rush from just a half full cup
as I soak up your touch like the salt of the earth
say they were born of the stars or some cosmic burst
on the birth of each evening inviting me
to lose myself to you and find myself free
when I can’t speak will you move my lips for me
or if your ship comes in will you send me out to sea
when you couldn’t speak I moved your lips for you
I followed your lead
so I can predict your every move
we’re both driven but in different directions
if you substitute attention for affection
stare my vulnerability in the eye
you know until its strength by your side I’d lie
free in one sense to be bound in another
as we drop everything and pull ourselves together
there’s no cause to pause and search through all natures laws
if you lay down love as the only god
Damaged Goods gentlemen she says please stay seated I don’t stay in one place too long with raging desire but no desire to feed it she doesn’t need anyone isolation is her occupation she’d love to let love in but no one likes to go where others have been with enough regret she could bury a man she showed up on his doorstep like an animal beat to death he took her in and nursed her back to health but he can’t keep her let alone keep her well she doesn’t take it out on anybody
she takes it out on her own body
she believes pain cures pain
if damaged goods can never be good again
now she’s got herself a good man she doesn’t know what to do with him he’s not afraid of the outcome as much as he’s afraid of her intentions no satisfaction no release even in security she screams don’t let me take me away reasons to go give me reasons to stay
Taste of Hunger
if you’re going to use me at least use me up
I don’t want what’s left of me when you’re done
I’m not sure where need comes from
but it never comes alone and it comes in more ways than one
I have to get myself something no one can take away from me
I want nothing more than anything to want nothing more than anything
though I’d wish to have no wish
born in want we all seek this find life’s grandest secret
there might be none to begin with
I play because I can’t quit
I’m not sure how much longer
I’ll fight myself because I think I always win
it just gives me the taste of hunger
I can’t demand anything where there is nothing to get
I find it kind of hard to hide something that isn’t
I used to live in this script but now my part no longer fits
I can’t explain one part of this without confusing all of it
my senses deceive me through manic panicked frantic frenzies
emptiness puts me at ease but not when you know I have it in me
if I back out now I’m not sure what I’m back into
I’m bitter when I lose If it’s because someone else wrote my rules
as I’m one step too far behind but we didn’t start at the same starting line
you can have it all alright just not all at the same time
as what’s been eating me alive is the thought that I could survive
without the bread of life and all you have offer
when are you going to fill me in
will I belong to everything when nothing belongs to me
or will I belong to everything if I give myself to everything
anything I could become would be a reminder of who I was
and who wants to be just a sacrificial victim
if I don’t throw myself at your feet will you bend me low to my knees
until I’m in over my head over my dead body over my dead body
I play because I can’t quit
I’m not sure how much longer
I fight myself I don't think I always win
it just gives me the taste of hunger
If it’s going to use me I hope it uses me up I don’t want what’s left of me when it’s done
Neurosis Put to Sound
do you write down everything except for what you’re thinking
have you seen and thought things that would have left you better off blind
I can’t go anywhere where I’m not there
I’m filing a complaint Dr. See you failed to check my eyes
I can’t regain my innocence so I’m pleading ignorance
as I put the pain on trial and put reason to the rhymes
around here if you sing words like a death wish
no one should ever know
how it won’t let up until you let out it won’t let you go
you won’t get rid of me not that easily
like a true napoleon in exile makes armies of the enemy
I see you attack first to avoid being hurt
but pre-emptive rituals and instinct don’t make a victory
how long have I been gone
half right equals half wrong
if the world is just one giant grave
prepare to be buried by your adversary
if they sing words like a death wish
no one should ever knowhow it won’t let up until they let out it won’t let them goif I could change one thing about myself I might be somebody else but it might be worth something someday for me to keep myself around neurosis put to sound as I write down everything except for what I’m thinking
Born Fully Grown say when you’ve had enough I’ve taken the long way to every short cut I’m catching on or maybe just catching up more and more down every road I go
I’m lead a little further from what I first called home
between what’s done for love and what’s done for show
there’s no room to react
feeling born fully grown
we rewind our situations and pretend we’re not affected
to learn to expect nothing is the gift of the neglected
I said sorry so many times like I was apologizing for being alive
we sit in circles and contemplate our work loads
we talk in circles about where we should go
I walked with support maybe in my shoes
as the rock I was living under was suddenly forced to move
more and more down every road I go
I’m lead a little further from what I first called home
between what’s done for love and what’s done for show
there’s no room to react
feeling born fully grown
I never thought this would be the cost of living
I’m lead a little further from what I first called home
between what’s done for love and what’s done for show
there’s no room to react
feeling born fully grown
I never thought this would be the cost of living
it’s gotten to that point if there’s a point worth making
Monkey
why didn’t I come to you sooner said Eve
I only wish to know what's going on
am I getting here at the same time as you are Adam
man where did you come from
here we’re trapped in a maze not in a cage
making our way down this garden path
let us stop and play our shadows in the shade say
what are you getting out of life other than a laugh
what am I getting out of life other than a laugh
what have we left to show
other than we’re never greater than what we do not know
on a path as broad as the destruction it leads to
was this something put on us or something we slipped into
as the winds of change came they stripped us bare
we had to adapt quick if Eden’s gates don’t care
staring out on this scene of earthly existence
I must admit a part of me is going to miss this
but you’ll go on without me just like you went on before me
god knows you’re just the world to me
we’re only human
we’re under the conditions
there are over 6 billion worlds now and they’re all inside of this one
go on beat your chest leave an impression on me
come the night we’re all naked as a monkey
what have we left to show
other than we’re never greater than what we do not know
When the Raven Sings
what else can you whisper in my aching ear
as you say no trick was played to get me here
dangle your golden cage
in an attempt to tempt my fate
I lust for something new to trust
at the end of the day
most of my learning takes place
after midnight now as I go off and lose my voice
at least that’s how it sounds
now that you know where you’re going
can you see you’re getting to me
I’ll find you in everything
especially when the raven sings
as far as I can see I’m on my way down
won’t you keep my head in the clouds but keep
my ear to the ground I’ve been searching for signs
I can’t hear nor see through propaganda so thick
it’s like a Hitler symphony
where everybody stands with their mirror in hand
they only want to understand you
after you end up like them
now that you know where you’re going
can you see you’re getting to me I’ll find you in everything
especially when the raven sings
I have no explanation for the ways I’ve felt when I can’t turn to anyone else I turn on myself now your eyes can see what my tongue can’t tell I can’t show you what I want I can’t show you to yourself hush little baby don’t say a word mamma’s going to buy you a mocking bird and if that mocking bird if she can’t sing the raven’s going to take you under it’s broken wing until you’re hearing melodies in air raid sirens it’s the song of sadness that gets stuck in our heads now
Ash
you were too young to know
you were too young to go
now a grave cold stone
shows the date you were baptized
in fire and terrified
baptized in fire
I would have taken your place
but I was half a world away
I keep reliving that day
like thinking I don’t want to be in this especially if it crashes
in a plane over Panama my world went to ashes
I have traveled since then
Niagara Falls to the Grand Canyon
I haven’t found a thing
I haven’t found you
I stood on that canyon’s edge
and I stared straight ahead
like I knew it was coming
and I didn’t care when it hit me
you can scream until your last breath
you can run until there is nothing of you left
but you can’t cry tears good enough for death
would you mind if I don’t mind
you say try to leave it all behind
